she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Randomize
