hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
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