I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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