He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
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