he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Randomize
