She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
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My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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