I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize
