Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I got inside last night via doggy door
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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