i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
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Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
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I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
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