I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
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