so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Randomize
