I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
I don't think brook has ever known best
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
