i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
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