Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Randomize
