I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
Randomize
