I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
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