Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
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