Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
