I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
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