4 words: hood of his car
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Randomize