just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
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