come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Randomize
