so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
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