yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
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