I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
