we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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