is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
Randomize
