I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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