Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
