i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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