just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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