You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
