I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Never joke about your clitoris.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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