im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Randomize