Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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