But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
