I swear she didn't look like that last week.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
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