I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
