She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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