At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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