You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
