You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Duck Duck Cougar?
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
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