I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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