oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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