its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Randomize
