fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize
