Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
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