How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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