Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Randomize
