I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
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